how I feel about snow

Dear snow.

I do not like you, no I don't!

I do not like you on my car.

I do not like you on the roads.

I do not like you in my way.

I wish that you would not stay.

I do not like you in my hair.

I do not like you anywhere!

So if you please just go away.

I do not like you any day.

Sincerely,

Rachel

what to do.

I've recently hit a bad luck streak. It seems to be slowing now, but there for awhile it was almost out of control. In the midst of my bad luck I received my letter from the nursing school letting me know I was not being admitted to the IU school of Nursing :( After being declined twice I'm beginning to wonder if I am meant to do this. I have looked into a few different majors to pursue instead of nursing.. nothing has really sparked my interest too much. But here are a few options... Dental Hygiene, Medical Imaging and anything else that I can use my previous prerequisites for. I'm leaning towards dental hygiene. I'm just waiting to see which classes I can get into for next semester.

I have ONE week of this semester left. Two finals to go. I will officially be on winter break after 5:30 PM on Friday and I cannot wait.

I'm feeling terribly burnt out on school and could use some encouraging words..

life is crazy

Just wanted to give you guys an update on a few different things!

• new job

I got a new job at the Three Dog Bakery. I love it! I get to work with Natalie and some really fun girls. For those of you who are not familiar with this store it is an all natural bakery for dogs. We make some of the treats ourselves in the store and its a lot of fun! Check out the website if you are interested... http://www.threedogindy.com/

• nursing interview

This past week I had my nursing interview. Try number 2! I will find out the beginning of December if I have been admitted to the IU School of Nursing. Keeping my hopes up! If I don't get in I will be working towards the medical imaging program my next semester at IUPUI. And it will be rough squeezing in 6 classes. But I'm not giving up!

• car accident

This past weekend Natalie and I were driving to Cincinnati to visit family and we got into an accident. I got off work at 9:30 so we thought we'd just drive in after that. Dad warned me it wasn't a good idea and it turns out he was right. We were only 20 minutes away from grandma's house when it happened. There was a deer that was just hit and left in the road, several cars on the shoulder and one against the guard rail in the far left lane. I swerved to miss the deer, swerved to miss the cars and ended up against the guard rail. Neither one of us were hurt. God was definitely looking out for us. My car may be totaled, may be salvageable... it has yet to be decided. It seems I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time :(

• the house

The house is pending! It is almost official. If all goes according to plan the house will be sold and we close December 20th, meaning we have a month to pack up and get out. I have to find an apartment asap. The place I wanted to live has a wait list until february, so that's not going to work. There is lots of planning and packing to do. If you know of any nice apartments that aren't way expensive in the Fishers/Noblesville area, let me know!

That's all for now.

A break would be nice.

I am so burnt out. burnt out on everything. school. work. more work.

This last weekend was fall break. guess who did not get to enjoy fall break.. oh yeah me. why? because I worked ALL weekend. Oh and I had a microbiology test @ 8am the morning after what was supposed to be fall break.

And Thanksgiving is coming... about a month away. Oh wait.. guess who won't get to enjoy that break either... me again... because I work retail.

I'm 20. I'm supposed to be enjoying life. right? That's what I've been told. But it's so hard to do when I'm ALWAYS busy. I want to visit family, hang out with friends, enjoy my years in college. I feel like I work soooo much. I want to be less stressed out. I want to be able to get a good nights sleep. I work hard because I want a good job, I want a good life... but I want to enjoy growing up.

I wish I could just quit. But I also don't know if I know how to do that. I have bills and goals which make it hard to make an irrational decision like just quitting my job because I'm tired of being busy. But maybe I should try it and see where I'm taken.

I realize I'm having a minor pity party for myself right now. However, I needed to express these thoughts to someone... whoever may read this I suppose. I know that God has a plan for me.. and I know it's going to be WAY more awesome than the plan I may have for myself. But for now I'm just here figuring it out.

If you have any advice please do share.

kitty

This past saturday I adopted a kitten. She was free and came with pretty much everything. Someone found her and couldn't keep her, but bought everything she needed. My sister hooked me up and now kitty gets to hang out with me everyday. She is about 8 weeks old. And is veryyy active. I love her to pieces, she is so cute. But she's quite the biter. She loooves to play. She bounces spastically from one place to another and runs like a rocket. It's quite entertaining... And she plays in her litter box before she does her business. It looks like she's chasing an invisible bug haha. When she isn't playing she loves to snuggle. She sleeps with me at night. She has gone exploring around the house and finds the tiniest spaces to get into. But whenever I leave the house I always come back to find her nestled in the middle of my bed. It is the cutest thing!

This is my new kitty.

I haven't settled on a name yet. I'm considering Cleo. So if you have any ideas let me know!

Happily Ever After

In 1993, there was a movie that came out called "Happily Ever After". It is like a sequel to Snow White. But instead of the seven dwarfs there are the seven dwarfs' cousins. Instead of the queen, because she's dead, it is the queen's brother who is after Snow White.

Anyways. I loved this movie. I remember watching it all the time. I just recently came across a DVD store that has every DVD known to mankind... except Happily Ever After. I want this movie on DVD. We lost our VHS of it probably in one of the moves. The other day I watched this movie by chapters on youtube... someone else who loved it as much as me put the whole movie up. Ridiculous I know. I just w

anted to watch it so badly. I need to find it. Maybe Amazon will have it.

Just wanted to share this sweet movie with everyone. After watching it the other day I realized it is kind of a dark movie for children. Regardless, I still watched it and I still love it.

fun weekend.

I had a great weekend!
[For me it starts on Thursday night because I don't have Friday classes!]

Thursday night Emily and I reinstated date night. We talked and laughed and it was SO much fun! Can't wait for next week.

Friday I watched the Stump boys while Rick and Jaclyn had a night out. We played baseball and tag and made train tracks. I did baths and bedtime and enjoyed it so much. I love those two little stinkers. And for those of you who don't know... Jaclyn is prego. She should be popping out another one any day now. Excited for the new addition to that wonderful family! I hung out with Alicia that night, helped her pack for IWU. It was fun to talk and make jokes with her before she left for the semester.

Saturday I spent the whole day with the most amazing person ever. Wesley and I hung out outside for the most part because the weather was perfect! We went to Forest Park and played on the trains at the Indiana Transportation Museum. Then we went to Potters Bridge and walked around. The evening ended with a delicious dinner downtown at the Rathskeller. And he brought me a rose when he picked me up. He is so sweet!

Sunday I went to church with Wes and his parents. This was a blessing! I've had to work at American Eagle on Sunday mornings for the past month and this was the first time his parents came with us. It was an exciting morning. I worked later for a few hours.. it went by fast and I didn't have rude customers. After work my parents, Wes and I went to BD's Mongolian BBQ. delicious. Dad slipped on some water, fell to his knee and shattered his plate. He wasn't hurt. And Wes' blood boiled when no one cleaned up the water spill. This was fun to see. haha. That night we played cards. My parents almost always beat Wes and I, but it's fun anyways.

Monday I spent some time doing some much needed studying. [still a lot do to :/] Worked for a hours at American Eagle. time and a half! woo hoo. then enjoyed a fabulous dinner made by my mom.

I really enjoyed my weekend with family and friends. And the beautiful weather.

that's all for now. ♥

sleep.

I realize I'm only a week into classes but seriously.

On monday and wednesdays I have a 8AM class. this means I have to wake up before 6AM to get ready and leave by 6:45AM to get to class on time with all the crazies driving to work. whooaaaaa. morning traffic is crazy.. people r nutso! And I am NOT a morning person so these days are truly difficult. I try to go to bed early... but my body is never ready... because I don't have a schedule on the weekends AND on tuesday and thursdays I don't have class until 12:30PM. so I sleep in (a little). Every day is different. very different.

Today I got home from class early, had lunch with dad then came home and took a loooooong nap. And now I'm probably not going to be tired when I need to go to sleep tonight. But I was trying to study and could not keep my eyes open. It's a problem. I'll get used to it. hopefully.

Also I've been getting headaches every night and have some sort of sinus issue, maybe I've developed allergies? I don't know but that makes sleeping difficult as well.

I'll figure it out.
To sleep or be sleepy. I don't know.
:)

ready or not.

ONE WEEK EXACTLY.

ready or not..................one week til the fall semester classes start

not ready. dang it.
I feel like there is a lot to accomplish this next semester.

I CAN DO IT.
right?

sell this house.

I realize it has only been about two months with our house on the market. But it feels like so much longer.....

I so desperately want our house to sell sooner rather than later for my dad. he's living in a temporary transition until it does and I feel so bad for him. It will be weird living in an apartment and I will miss my parents company but I'm not worried. God is taking care of us and has a plan. We are just waiting to figure out what it is. He has a buyer for the house and knows exactly when they will look at the house and make an offer. We do not and this can make things difficult.

Pray for my family and give us patience.

summer

this summer... wow... how do I explain this summer?

key west. - gorgeous ocean. snorkeling. parasailing. kayaking. time with family.

transitions.
so many changes in such little time.
no longer a teen!
too busy.
motivation is just not there for summer school.
time with the stump boys!

great friends!
movies.
card games with my parents and wes.
kings island.


I guess summer is still not over.

one week of class left!
squeeze in some pool time.
maybe a visit to cincinnati.
see friends.
relax.

yepp, sounds good to me!

thoughts.

I'm currently sitting at Borders waiting for the showing at my house to be over.
I pray that today is the day!
That these people are the ones.
I just want the house to sell!
I'm tired of living in this transitional period.
I'm tired of being pulled a million different ways.
I think I need to take a break from life... is that possible?

Ugh.


In other news...
Dad and Oreo moved to Cincinnati a few weeks ago... I miss my puppy terribly and it is really weird without dad around during the week... but I suppose I should get used to it considering when the house sells I will be living in an apartment alone.
I'm waiting for the volunteering process at St. Vincent to finalize and begin the actual volunteering.
I'm trying to stay motivated for this summer school class... I do not recommend summer school to anyone. Blehh.
I still love babysitting and will always care for the kids I get to spend time with.
And I just became a Jean Expert at American Eagle.
Things with Wes are wonderful. And I am so thankful for him and all that he does. He always puts a smile on my face.

Update.

Just a couple BIG things I wanted to share...

First off.... Kelly moved out this past week and made her way down to Kansas, Missouri with her boyfriend. She arrived late last night, but made it down there "safely". My family does not agree with what she has decided to do with her life for the time being, however we still love her and are here for her whenever she may need us. Please just pray for Kelly and her safety while she is experiencing this new life so far away.

Next... For those of you that don't know my parents are moving back to Cincinnati. Our house is on the market, ready to sell. We had a showing Saturday and an open house today. Not too much interest thus far, but I know things will work out. Also, I'm in the process of finding an apartment. I will be staying in the area to finish school. There is a lot of transition happening all at once for my family. Again prayers are always helpful. Pray for the right buyer to see the house, a great deal on an apartment for me and a smooth and safe transition for us all.

Lastly... This past friday morning I received my Nursing letter. Excited and anxious I opened the envelope. Unfortunately, they were not able to offer me a spot in the program for the fall. This does not mean I'm going to give up. I will be reapplying for the spring. Yes I'm upset. I've had a good cry, but now its time to focus on what's next. God has a plan for me and definitely knows what He is doing. I truly believe this may have been a blessing in disguise. There is a lot going on in my life right now.

New, fun transitions and experiences ahead.
Staying positive, staying focused.

interview.

Today was my nursing interview... the last 10% of my application. I will find out no later than the first week of June whether I have been admitted to the IU School of Nursing or not. Nothing more to do, but pray and wait now.

As far as the interview goes, I feel like it went well. It was myself and two other applicants, along with a faculty member and nurse that has been in the field for 30 years. I was absolutely and completely nervous. My heart was beating entirely too fast, you could probably hear it if you were standing near me. We were called into the room and the five of us sat around a table. The interviewers fired their questions and the three of us answered. It was more informal than expected, but no less stressful. When the interview came to the end we said thank you and they wished us good luck. The two girls and I talked, trying to gauge how the others felt about the interview. Overall, for all of us, I think it went very well.

Again nothing to do but wait... I'll keep you posted on the results.
Can't wait for that letter.
♥

ahhhh

no motivation to study.
the end.

rain.

today was one of those typical cloudy, cold, dreary rainy kind of days.
however, its all about perspective...

the day started out kind of warm with the sun peaking through the clouds, I knew it wouldn't last long though. I got in my car and laying on the passenger seat was a pink rose. Surprise! Now there is a little story behind how this flower got in there. On sunday after I got home from vacation in Florida I hung out with Wes. For those of you who know don't know... Wes and I r dating. So we got dinner and went back to his house. He took me home later that night and I realized I left my keys at his house. Luckily, I had a spare key at home. So last night he came over to hang out and brought my keys along. Sneaky little Wes put the flower in there before he told me he was at me house. So surprise, there it was this morning. Fabulous way to start out my day. He's so sweet :)

so anyways, I headed over to babysit Aiden like every other thursday morning. A few minutes after Dana (Aiden's mom) left, she came back in the house with this face like "oh my gosh". She accidentally hit my car pulling out of the driveway. Not a big deal, a few scratches on both our bumpers. Life goes on, its not the first time my little civic has been scratched up. And so the morning continued. Aiden and I hung out for a little then headed over to Paul and Hank's house. The boys and I were outside playing baseball and tossing around a football. Clouds filled the sky rather quickly and it began to rain. No one wanted to go inside, so we put hoods up and played in the rain. The boys loved it!

Around 3:30 it was time for me to head to class. Now driving in the rain is not one of my favorite things... but today I really enjoyed it. Yesterday, I parked under a tree and no joke had like 10 drops of poop on my car. It was everywhere and totally gross. Today the rain washed away the bird poop. My car is clean once again. I got to school and sat in my car waiting for the rain to slow a little before I walked to class. I put my backpack on, my hood up and started walking. My shoes were getting wet, the wind was blowing and I was getting hit in the face with raindrops. I put my head down and next to the sidewalk were these beautiful, bright yellow flowers, I think they were daffodils. After that I didn't mind walking in the rain so much.

Who says rainy days have to be bad?
i had a great day.
♥

beeeaaachhh.

ahh i love the beach. currently on spring break in florida, having a fabulous time hanging out with friends! just wanted to share some pictures...


we went to the new smyma beach, just south of daytona. it was windy but warm enough. some of the crew was left behind so it was Brooke, Katrina, Clair, Steve, Bob, Nate and I. good times laying out, splashing in the water, flying a kite, and we built a hole, put steve in it and turned him into a mermaid. it was really fun.

more pictures and stuff to come later this week.
kbye :)

babysitting

i love babysitting.
maybe its cause i am blessed with amazing families and wonderful children to watch.
all i know is i wouldn't give up any of the time i spend with them.

yesterday Paul and I spent ALL day outside enjoying the sun ( Hank was napping for most of it ) BUT we had a blast! kicked a big ball around, he rode his bike and we raced. splashed in the water. chased each other. found a caterpillar - it was dying, Paul told me it was sleepy. cutest thing ever. it was so much fun :)


today Aiden and I went to target, I needed hair spray. and i let him pick out some gum.. it was the cutest thing watching him figure out what kind he wanted. sometimes people give me the weirdest looks walking around holding his hand. keep in mind he is 4 and i'm a young looking 19 year old. whatever, i like it. haha

now i'm heading back over to hang out with Paul and Hank. see what we can get into today....

oh i LOVE my kids :)

cannot wait.

haven't posted anything for awhile. that dang physio test sucked the life outta me.

anyways...

CANNOT WAIT FOR SPRING BREAK!
i leave on saturday for florida. 5 CLASSES, 4 DAYS and a LOOOONNG car ride before i get to see my best friend Jordan! and Nate. it is going to be so much fun. i'm driving down with natalie and jacob.. and we'll meet up with brooke and katrina down there. i am pumped! almost cannot contain my excitement. oh && i might get to see LUKIE. but thats only a maybe. i hope that works out tho, miss that kid.

BUT i have a lot to get done before i leave. homework is first... bleh... trying to stay motivated, but its really just not working. going tanning today. putting money in the bank. doing laundry and possibly going to start packing. because i'm just so excited and cant wait!

ready for a great week spent with friends in the beautiful sunshine!
pray for good weather and safe travels!

busy.busy!

always so busy. life is so routine, it's fine. i don't mind until homework builds up or i have no time for my friends. today i have no obligations. no work. no babysitting. BUT i'm going to spend my day doing homework, catching up, and getting ahead. lammmeeeeee.

sometimes that's what it takes.

it'll be a productive day, crossing things off my checklist. i kinda love that feeling. And if i get enough homework done today i may reward myself with a little shopping spree. can't beat that......... alright, alright i already have things at hold at work, i know i'm going shopping today.

time to get motivated!

thursdays.

thursdays are always such a busy day for me.

wake up, get ready.
watch Aiden at 9 until about 12.
go hang out with the stump boys, Paul & Hank around 12:15 til 3:45.
physio lecture at 4:30.
sign language at 6.
AND THEN.....

date night with EMILY WEST.

yes i love babysitting, class is a drag.
but every thursday always ends with lots of fun and laughter :)

God thank you for Emily.
she is an amazing girl and a fabulous friend.
this past year was crazy...
BUT we both survived through each other.
i loves you emi :)

tonight we are going to see shutter island.
"pull yourself together Teddy"
can't wait.

just gotta get through class.
blehh.

michael bublé

doing homework.
listening to my itunes on shuffle.
&& Michael Bublé comes on.

[[ Haven't Met You Yet ]]

I'm not surprised.
Not everything lasts.
I've broken my heart so many times I stopped keeping track.
Talk myself in.
I talk myself out.
I get all worked up, then I let myself down.

I tried so very hard not to lose it.
I came up with a million excuses.
I thought I thought of every possibility.

And I know someday that it'll all turn out.
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, that I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

I might have to wait.
I'll never give up.
I guess it's half timing,
And the other half's luck.
Wherever you are.
Whenever it's right.
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And baby your love is gonna change me.
And now I can see every possibility.

But somehow I know that it'll all turn out.
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

They say all's fair.
In love and war.
But I won't need to fight it.
We'll get it right and,
We'll be united.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And being in your life is gonna change me.
And now I can see every single possibility, mmmm.

And someday I know it'll all turn out.
And I'll work to work it out.
Promise you, kid, I'll give more than I get,
Than I get, than I get, than I get.

You know it'll all turn out.
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, to give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

I just haven't met you yet.


this is my song for now.
whether i've met the right guy and timing was off or i have yet to meet him..
they always say you'll know for sure when its right.

staying strong.
waiting patiently.
i'm young.

[and not ready]

continuing to focus on God. focus on school. and who i am.
♥

its the little things in life.

my dad made me hot chocolate this morning.

today is gonna b a good day.

think before you speak.

i woke up with puffy eyes and a headache.... a long night of crying will do that to you.

my sister and i got in yet another fight last night. but this time... it was different. we always yell and scream and push each other, say things we don't mean. this time i said i said i hated her.

of course i didn't really mean it.
but my dad reminded me of how powerful the word hate is.

she's just probably the most difficult person to understand and deal with. we are so different. she is her own person. and as hard as i try to help and fix things i always fail. when will i learn. i can't change who she is. i can't control how she acts. she will understand in her own time.

its hard to explain why i get so upset when she does something we both know is wrong. but she's stubborn and apparently so am i.
i do know that i love her.

today i apologized for some of the things i said and explained my frustration.
but really you can't take back the things you say.

my filter broke last night and i relearned a good lesson,
think before you speak.